Oh, yeah, I has a blog.

November 16, 2007 at 9:12 pm 1 comment

Dear Diary,

I almost forgot to write in you today! I’m sorry, I was busy doing stuff like working for a living so I can pay the bills and taking care of errands. What did YOU do all day?

I am feeling slightly cranky today, only because Thanksgiving crept suddenly upon me and I haven’t done a lick of shopping for it and so I have to do it all this weekend. You know, when everyone else on the planet will be shopping.

Shopping at the food co-op in Bellingham on the weekend before Thanksgiving is an especially trying experience, akin to something in one of the lower borgia of the seventh circle of hell. It’s bad enough on a regular day, but this weekend in particular is a Herculean test of patience, a virtue on which I am already perpetually short.

Last year, I waited for five minutes while a woman in a velvet cloak contemplated nuts and monopolized a full row of bulk bins as she did so, when all I wanted was to grab my pecans and hazelnuts and get as far away from her Renaissance-worshiping patchouli stink as possible. Then there are the people in the produce aisle who congregate in obstructive gaggles, oblivious to agenda-minded shoppers, until they look up with a nose-wrinkle of disdain when you say “excuse me” like you’re the dick just because you don’t want to hang out in the friggin market all damn day until they’re done chatting about reiki or whatever.

But they have the bomb produce and bulk foods, and the biggest free range birds, so I kind have to suffer through it, or deal with slightly fewer crowds and infuriatingly bad quality produce at the supermarket. And bad produce pisses me off far more than stinky dreadlocks.

Anyway, here is my menu so far:

-roast turkey (duh) and homemade cranberry sauce

-something with green beans so long as it doesn’t have cream of mushroom soup in it because green bean casserole is Bad Touch and I don’t know how I ever liked it as a kid

-smashed red potatoes with pecorino romano, shallots and arugula

-stuffing with pork sausage, hazelnuts and wild mushrooms (lobster, oyster or chanterelle, probably), and a smaller, mushroomless portion set aside for my fungiphobic husband

-green salad

-pecan tart with chocolate sauce and vanilla bean ice cream

If I am not broke after all that, I might put together a cheese plate so people can snack while I toil.

Thinking about all that yummy food has made me feel less cranky about shopping this weekend. I hope it will last long enough to at least get me through bulk foods, because nobody is getting Thanksgiving dinner if I end up in the pokey for assault.

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Entry filed under: Uncategorized.

Picture Day/I apparently need someone to manage my finances for me and perhaps even wipe my butt because I’m clearly incapable of taking care of myself. Saturday Blahs

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. al  |  November 17, 2007 at 5:35 pm

    I hate health food nuts. I think that’s what turned me away from eating as healthy as I should and have. I have no desire to talk about what supplement will give you really satisfying bowel movements or the health benefits of some Asian mold tea. I just wanted my carrots. bastards. dirty patooie stink bastards.

    Reply

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